Windows 10 Anniversary update: Your Last Chance Microsoft!

There are those in my profession that would call me unprofessional.  Others might even go so far as to say I'm just a disgruntled crank festooned with the requisite tin-foil hat when it comes to Microsoft Windows 10.

Here's the thing....

I don't care what you think.  I know what I've experienced and having spent most of my working career in the field losing countless hours to the cavalcade of flaws that is a new Microsoft OS I say with confidence...

Windows 10 is not an operating system, it's a delivery mechanism predicated on a marketing strategy.

I look at Windows 10 the same way I look at car commercials.  It's full of glitz, glamour and endless marketing campaigns with the sole intent of dangling shiny objects to distract you from it's intrusive and unreliable nature.

So yes, I've used it almost exclusively for a year, accepted the endless updates, 20 minute shutdown times and random lockups.  All with the intention of giving the OS a fair shake and hey the price was right.

In the intervening year between update 1607 and the launch of Windows 10 I've used the OS enough to find virtually no compelling reason to recommend it over Windows 7 for anything but support for the OS beyond 2020.

That Microsoft is now charging a minimum of $119 for the OS is an affront considering how much of a marketing platform Windows 10 is.

There are elements in Windows 10 that depending on the version are absolutely detrimental to an enterprise environment.  For example, in older versions of Windows you could get away with using a "Pro" version of Windows in your enterprise.  Yes, there were stripped down "Enterprise" versions only available to those with a Microsoft Licensing agreement but they were few and far between in my own experience.

A PRO version could connect to a Windows domain and allowed just as much control over the user experience.  The only caveat being a bit more overhead cruft inherited from its "consumer" roots.

Today a PRO version is much the same but unlike previous versions is subject to the "consumer" OS experience.   Meaning Microsoft and not your IT department is largely in control of the desktop experience in your enterprise.

Enterprise gives you all the control you used to have with "just" a PRO version but now you have to pay a subscription fee for that privilege.

I don't like that and I've taken active measures against that strategy including using SpyBot Anti-Beacon, refusing to connect my Microsoft account to the OS and denying the allure of the Microsoft Store.

Have you noticed that I've yet to say anything compelling about Windows 10?  That's because it's not and simply put there isn't anything compelling unless you work for Microsoft's marketing department.

Windows 10 is "probably" a better OS than its predecessors but you'll likely never see the benefit for all the cruft piled on top of it.  That's where the promise of the "Enterprise" versions come in but even they have been stained by the tarnish of a consumer OS.

So with the Anniversary update this is my last stand with Windows 10.  I expect many of my issues to be addressed or I'm jumping off the boat.  I could care less about "features" if they get in the way of what I'm trying to get done.

With that in mind I've documented my latest Windows 10 experience.  That being the installation and review of Windows 10 Anniversary update 1607.

I invite you to enjoy in 20 or so minutes what took me 2 1/2 hours.

Desktop Video Capture with MSI Afterburner: Update - How to exclude interfering programs with RivaTuner

Way back in December of 2014 I made a video about capturing your desktop with MSI Afterburner 4.x.

For power users capturing your desktop on video isn't any big deal except when you discover that capturing game footage is very different from capturing a Powershell tutorial.  In short it won't happen without some tweaking.

The original video covered most of what you needed to know and to date is one of the most popular on my IT Mostly YouTube channel.  But it  soon became evident within a few weeks that people needed a little more.

Specifically, what to do when something gets in the way of Afterburner like say, Dropbox??

There were a lot of helpful comments for the original video.  So many, in fact that it was the inspiration for a follow-up.

Which is what you have before you now.

This short Update to the original Afterburner Desktop Capture shows how to exclude specific programs from interfering with video capture.

So without further delay, here's the update everyone was waiting for.

Take control of those nightmare technical interviews

I had a recent experience that was a perfect example of what it's like to go through a bad technical interview.

I say "bad" because the whole time I was there it was less about what I knew and more about trying to make me look like an idiot.

Yeah, I know there's such a thing as the hot seat and technical interviews are designed to be tough.  But we strayed from the technical into the psychological for no good reason other than one of the guys across the table from me just wasn't going to ever be a fan.  It became a game of minefields.

Thing is, I wasn't playing which just made the inquisitor across the table make more of an ass out of himself the longer it went on.

I've often said that the interview process is adversarial.  The premise being that you're either lying, unqualified or unworthy of being in the same room with a "guru."

In the video below I give you some pointers on how to get the best outcome you can without sacrificing your dignity in the process.

If you can, make a positive out of a negative.

Windows 10 alternative installation

So if you're like me and prefer to pick your own time to take the Windows 10 plunge then you're probably going to need some help when you finally push the go button.

That's because unlike most who'll take advantage of the free upgrade, disabling the automatic upgrade process requires a little more effort but no more than installing any other OS. It's still an upgrade so you still get to keep all your old apps ( so long as they're compatible.)

I haven't changed my position and the tight integration with Microsoft's ecosystem is ever present in Windows 10 but you can get around it.  In fact I'll be doing a series of videos in the near future on just how to minimize the amount of information you share.  

Microsoft may be taking a page from Apple's book with this latest version of the "one Windows to rule them all" mantra but for now it's more of an inconvenience than an Apple-like mandate.  

The reality of tech in the 21st century is that the more convenience you demand the more of your life you'll be asked to expose.  With Windows 10 it's still mostly your choice of how wide to open the Kimono but you need to know what you're buying into.  

For the most part, Windows users have gotten off easy with privacy but with an OS that's more connected than any previous version, it's high time we stop taking privacy for granted.  Look, if it's got a chip in it  somebody can hack it.  That's just the world we live in.  So make sure to clean up your act before upgrading to Windows 10.

That said, you may need some help when you finally do the upgrade.  That's what the series of videos below will show you.  I'll walk you through creating media for a manual install then using it to upgrade a Windows 7 Ultimate PC.

Check them out.  You'll find them a bit irreverent but likely similar to your own experience when you do upgrade.  

Windows 10 on ESX with all the uglies...

I've just completed the first in what I hope to be a short series of videos in the vein of the Windows 8 videos I did a few years ago.  This one is about installing and configuring Windows 10 on an ESX 5.5 virtual host.

Come along and see what it's like with all the uglies left in!  I don't know about you but I hate tutorials that never tell me what to do when something bad happens!

Without further adieu I give you Windows 10 on ESX!

IT on the cheap: Dealing with resource attacks

In a perfect world the Internet would be free, nobody would want to steal your stuff and bad people would be too stupid to do any harm.

Alas, we don't live in such a blissful Utopia and have to deal with the seedy underbelly of a connected world.  As such if you're the guy managing servers and networks you have to be concerned about security.

It doesn't matter how deftly you can crank out pages of powershell commands if your network is under attack.  Worse, if you don't have the budget for the latest IDS (Intrusion Detection System) you're going to have to do some of the heavy lifting.

Thankfully, it's not that hard and while not the ideal scenario you can improve security even if your tools come from Ebay and Best Buy sales.

So take a look at the video below while I walk you through some basic security procedures and deal with an ongoing attack.

FIX your BASH already! Correcting the BASH shellshock vulnerability

By now you've heard that just about every 'Nix box on the planet is vulnerable to a flaw in the BASH shell that allows code insertion regardless of your level of access.  Worse, it's been that way for 25 years!

Ok, so that's a problem but what's the solution?

It's actually pretty simple...

First you test, then you patch, then you test again.  I've provided some command line snippets you can use on your Red Hat or Debian based Linux distros.  The testing command is almost universal the patch commands are more system specific.  Regardless, you need to get this done ASAP as less than 24 hours after its discovery there were already active bots scanning the net looking to exploit the vulnerability.

The command snippets you need are below as well as a video showing the update process.  The following link had the most complete information I've found if you want to know more.

https://www.digitalocean.com/community/tutorials/how-to-protect-your-server-against-the-shellshock-bash-vulnerability

You've got what you need, now go to it!



()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Testing command (at a shell prompt or terminal session)

env VAR='() { :;}; echo Bash is vulnerable!' bash -c "echo Bash Test"


Bash updates:

Debian/Ubuntu-

sudo apt-get update && sudo apt-get install --only-upgrade bash

CentOS/Red Hat

sudo yum update bash

Web hosting for cheap on a virtual machine

The thing you have to remember about working in IT is that no two projects are ever alike.  Even if you're being asked to do the same thing for 10 different people you're still going to be surprised.  Sometimes even on the same project.

So it was with my latest foray into virtualization on the cheap.  The client could barely afford to pay me let alone invest thousands in licensing fees.  So we had to get creative without sacrificing stability. 

That can be a tall order especially when everything you're using is Open Source. 

Now I have my issues with the way the Open Source community does things but a good product is a good product regardless of who made it.

Of course, "good" is a relative term. 

It's always a trade off.  A bit of pain to save a lot of money is fair but too much pain can cost more than if you'd just went with a commercial option.  And I do mean "commercial" because I still firmly believe that any product that relies on a fractured support community or high priced "experts" to make a product work is just this side of an amateur effort. 

Not that all open source products are that way, however.  

Some communities are better than others and if they put together a solid package with "readable" documentation then I'm all for it.  If we're just stroking somebody's ego so they can get a guest spot on Floss Weekly I'll take a pass every time.

I put CentOS, the open source version of Red Hat Enterprise Linux, and Z-panel, the open source clone of C-panel squarely in the "good" category.

Together they offered a cost effective and relatively stable platform for web hosting.  Add in a virtual platform for them to live on and you've got a web host that could fit on a keychain.  Not bad...

Instead of bore you with 4000 words of text describing my latest open source virtualization adventure I've created a video that takes you from creating the virtual machine to administering your new web host. 

As you're watching you may miss a few of the links in the video.  I've provided them below.

https://www.centos.org/

http://www.zpanelcp.com/

Zpanel Docs page

Z-panel install tips
Zpanel important paths
Zpanel password reset

An ESXi host, a NAS and NFS

When you're an IT guy tinkering is part of your lifestyle.  There has to be at least a modicum of curiosity about how things work.   We drive department heads crazy because just keeping stuff working isn't good enough for us.  We want that extra Megabit of throughput or another free Gigabyte out of the SAN.

Sadly, most of us can't afford to set up an server farm in a spare bedroom just to satisfy our need to tinker; but with virtualization you can come very close.

That is of course the promise.  Being able to harness the same capabilities of a small enterprise with a lot less hardware is undeniably a good thing.  Letting us run wild in our own little enterprise is even better.

VirtualBox, VMWare Workstation and their kind is fine for taking a new OS out for a spin but they fall a bit short for giving you real world skills.

ESXi, however, is another story.  Maybe more than any other platform, it's probably the most useful and relevant virtualization lab platform you can experiment with.  Don't confuse this with your grandpa's ESXi, though. 

Starting with version 5, VMWare decided that ESXi is the one hypervisor to rule them all instead of just being ESX's little brother.  That means anything you do with ESXi translates to what you can do in the enterprise.

It's one thing to play with virtual servers in VMWare but it's quite another to play with the platform itself.   After all, the more you tinker with it the better it works right?  Well, at least till we blow something up...

So this time around I decided I wasn't satisfied just locking myself out of the VSphere Client because I forgot the password.  I wanted to get some external storage online but I didn't have a spare ISCSI array laying around.   So I decided to venture into the wonderful world of NFS.

In ESXi you've basically got 2 options for storage.

1. Local - meaning it's either physically attached to the host or on a dedicated backbone via ISCSI

2. NFS - Which is pretty much "other"

Local's easy, if your storage controller can see it so can VMWare.  ISCSi  adds a wrinkle but so long as your target's on the network it's not a big deal.

NFS, ah, that's a different story.  A lot of Sys Admins can go an entire career without having to deal with it.   Like SMB, NFS is designed to offer up access to files on a network.  Those shares are usually hosted on Unix servers but unlike SMB, NFS is designed to fool your local PC into thinking a network resource is local.  An impressive feat compared to the clunky "Map Network Drive" or CLI "Net Use" commands in Windows.

Ok, so we know what NFS is but why do we care about it for VMWare?  Simple, most NAS storage devices will have support for the protocol to allow UNIX clients to access their shares.  Set up NFS on your NAS and you've given ESXi another potential datastore to play with.

NFS has it's quirks but most NAS management interfaces make it a relatively painless process to set up.  Once that happens just be sure you have a solid network connection between your virtual host(s) and the NAS.

Follow along with the video as I set up an NFS share for ESXi 5.5, play with a VM that lives on it and even break it!

VMWare 5.5, Vconverter and VSphere Client tips

Let's face it, when you think virtual servers, Microsoft isn't the first name to jump into your head.  VMWare shows up a whole lot more than Hyper-V and chances are if you're in a large enough organization it's the one you've got to manage.

The latest incarnation is version 5.5 which is primarily an answer to a laundry list of bugs that started with the 5.0 platform. 

For most people, the first time they get to play with virtualization is in a sandbox like VirtualBox or VMWare Workstation.  But what if you want to go beyond just taking Ubuntu out for a spin on your Windows desktop?

That's where ESX comes in and even in a large deployment you're going to find out that your most important tools are deceptively simple.  That being the VSphere Client and VConverter.

The whole concept of Virtualization revolves around the Host.  It's the container (hardware) that all your virtual machines live on.  While VMWare's VCenter suite has a number of tools and features to help you manage the virtual enterprise nothing really ever strays that far from those two tools.  Know them and you've got a handle on 80% of what VMWare is all about.

The VSphere client is your portal into managing a single VMWare host and while you can learn a lot by creating a Virtual Machine from scratch on it most people take a shortcut.  That shortcut is provided by VConverter which lets you take an image of your physical PC and migrate it to and ESX Host.  It's called Physical to Virtual Migration or P2V for short.

As VMWare has matured so have the tools.  VConverter now allows you to use backups from programs like Acronis True Image and Symantec to create a new virtual machine.  It also allows the import of Microsoft Virtual PC and HYPER-V images and a few other formats as well.  In fact, VConverter is so versatile that its VM's can often be used in other virtualization platforms like VirtualBox. 

That's the good but of course there's always a few bad apples in the bunch.  The most annoying of which is the fact that VConverter still needs Windows.   Speaking of windows, migrating a Windows installation often requires having full administrative privileges on the machine running VConverter as well as the disabling of UAC (User Account Control) on the Windows P2V target.  Those aren't exactly best security practices in my book.

That there isn't a native Linux version of the VConverter utility only exacerbates nagging problems with migrating Linux deployments to the VMWare platform.   

That doesn't mean you can't move Linux PC's to ESX or even Workstation.  The option is there, it just doesn't always work and requires a lot of configuration of the Linux host just to find out it doesn't.

Still, getting familiar with the tools is a worthwhile endeavor and can only add to your arsenal of IT skills. 

It's said a picture is worth a 1000 words so a video should be worth at least twice that, so I've provided one below...

Enjoy!

Windows 98 SE on VirtualBox

If you're sane the first question should be...."Why????"

Well, because we can and every now and again we need to reacquaint ourselves with just how good we have it these days.

It's Windows 98 on VirtualBox!  Follow along as I suffer the pain of trying to get a 15 year old operating system working in a VM.  

No, it didn't go quietly or softly into the night...

BTW, if you want to see some real pain check out the Windows 3.11 video below it.

Enjoy!

Virtualization on the cheap with VirtualBox

Recently, I've been working on virtualization projects and one of them just didn't rise to the level of a VMWare rollout.  Even ESXi was a bit much for the deployment so instead we went with virtualbox which was much cheaper (free) and easier to administer.

Follow along with the following videos as I show you how I "kick it old school" with DOS and Windows for Workgroups in the latest VirtualBox platform.  Why such an old OS? Hey, anyone can load up Ubuntu or XP but a 20 year old OS takes some real effort and forces you to get up to your elbows in the virtualization platform.

Links: 

VirtualBox
Windows 3.1 Driver Pack

Is it a Role or a Feature?

I had an interesting experience today.  Without boring you with the details let's just say I'm no richer for the experience save for providing the catalyst for the following instructional tidbit.  The catalyst in this case was a question posed to me.  I was asked what the difference was between a Role and a Feature when configuring a Windows server.

Now most of you who have any experience at all in Windows Administration may not necessarily be comfortable with the concepts of Server Roles and Features.  It's been a slow but steady evolution from an abstract label to a shortcut in Server Manager. 

Since Windows 2000's introduction of Active Directory, the concept of a server role took on new meaning.  Instead of being limited to just designating a server as a Primary or Backup Domain controller now we had multiple roles that made the old labels moot.

Yeah, I'm talking about the most confusing collection of server "Roles" ever introduced to the Windows Universe, the FSMO or Flexible Single Master Operation.  5 labels that have confused Windows Administrators for a decade. 

I mean, the PDC emulator is fairly intuitive, for example.  We know what that's for right?  Well only partially because that role handles a lot more than just  Primary Domain Controller services for Windows NT (non AD) networks.  It also provides Time synchronization, Group Policy replication, and account lockout and password change services for an entire windows domain.  If the server that holds this role fails you're going to have a very bad day until you move it to another server.

Relative ID master?  All that does is keep all the names on your network unique.  It's function is to keep combining computer or user object Identifiers (SIDS) with a pool of unique Identifiers managed by this role (RID)  Combining the two values ensures that no two objects on an AD network are alike even if everything else about them is the same.  The RID master can't allow its pool of RIDS to go empty or it won't have anything to combine with the new SIDS that come from a new user or computer account.  Yeah, that's real obvious.

How about the Infrastructure Master?  It's a role and its function is... uhh...Oh yeah, it makes sure that if someone from one domain gets rights to something in another domain their specific information is recognized properly.  How come such a serious sounding name for such a tiny function that's so rarely used?  Whatever..

Those three roles are considered the "Domain" roles in Active Directory networks.  That means they only affect the immediate domain they serve.  There are two other roles that are considered Forest or Enterprise level roles.  That means they live at the top of your AD network above all the domains (assuming there's more than 1) that branch off of the "trunk" of your "forest". 

In case all this talk of Directories and Forests is confusing try a different metaphor.  Think of AD in the context of a Phone Book instead of a forest.  You usually have one Phone book for a town and it contains all the names and numbers of the people with phones.  Those names and numbers can be thought of as domains.

Now say your aunt Bessie changes her phone number.  The phone book is going to need to be updated to reflect the change or she'll be very lonely because nobody will be able to call her anymore.  That would be sad for Aunt Bessie and nobody wants that!

If the phone company decides to change the area code for your town then all the people listed in the phone book have to tell their out of state relatives what the new area code is or they won't be able to call them anymore.  Changing the area code, by the way, would be considered an enterprise event to the people listed in the phone book.  So would changing the name of the town by the way. 

It's the concept of changing names within an organization that leads us to the first of the two "Forest" or "Enterprise" level roles in Active Directory.  Coincidentally, it's called the Domain Naming Master and the simplest way to explain its role is to refer back to our theoretical phone book. 

Remember when Aunt Bessie changed her number?  Well she's a spry old gal and decided to get hitched up to a nice older gent.  That meant her last name changed.  To make sure everyone can find the happy newlyweds we'll need to get the phone book entry updated.  To accomplish that, she had to call the phone company and ask them to change it.  The phone company is responsible for changing Bessie's name in the phone book and they are the only ones that could do it.  If the phone company is closed nothing changes just as no domain names throughout the enterprise can change if the Domain Naming Master goes offline.

The second and final enterprise FSMO role is easier to understand since its name is a little more descriptive than the others.  It's the Schema Master and if you have any experience with databases its function will be instantly recognizable.  If you remember that all the information in Active Directory is stored in a database then you know that something has to control the way its organized.  That's the function of the Schema Master along with copying (replicating) any changes that occur to the Schema to the rest of the Enterprise. 

Going back to the phone book example, the Schema Master would be the guy who decides how the phone book is going to be organized.  Will it be sorted by name or phone number? How much information will each listing contain?  These questions are all answered by the guy printing the phone book.  He is the Schema Master.

Ok maybe not so dramatic but the Schema Master is an important Role.  Without it Active Directory couldn't exist.

I've actually went a bit deeper into FSMO roles than I planned but it's important information.  It's also important to know how Microsoft tends to overload their terminology.

In the previous discussion I've laid out what Microsoft defines as a "Role" in the context of functions that support Active Directory.  There's another definition of a server role, however, that has nothing to do with supporting Windows but rather defines services for users. 

You may have noticed that I haven't said much about "Features" to this point.  That has everything to do with Microsoft's overloaded terminology again.  In the context of an FSMO role a feature is nothing more than a facility for management of a given role.

In the context of a Server Role, however, features become very important.  A Server Role in Windows 2000 and later is designated set of services that support user activities.  Examples are File and Print services, Application Server and DNS Server roles.  Each of these roles is task based defining a set of services to be offered to users by the server. 

Server Roles can be viewed more as containers than mechanisms.  They are comprised of programs and services tailored to the support of the role.  Features are usually the programs and services that provide the functionality of the role.  Think of it as the option list on a new car.

A new car has one role, to provide transportation.  It's price, however, is dependent on the number of features it has.  A base model won't have as many amenities but will still satisfy the core requirement to provide transportation.  Many times you can specify additional equipment to tailor its function to better match your needs.  This affords additional functionality or "Features" without affecting the core requirement of providing transportation.

It's really that simple.  Roles define a task and features support it. 

That's about enough, I really don't want to write the word "Role" anymore..

:-)

Hyper-V on Windows Server 2012

This is the latest video series on Server 2012 and specifically Hyper-V.  If you've ever wondered about the Microsoft flavor of Virtualization I've gone ahead and took the plunge for you....

Enjoy this tutorial and overview.

Semi-Competent Tutorials for the mildly interested.... ;-)

Part 1...


Part 2

Server 2012 - Interface Tricks

A quick video containing some interface tricks that I left out of my other two videos.

Enjoy!

Hangin' with Server 2012

I've done a couple of introductory videos just so you can see what it's like to get around in Server 2012.  That means learning to use the interface, basic administration, adding roles and basic AD setup.  If you've managed a 2008R2 deployment 80% is the same but there are a few differences to take note of.  Check it out below.

Enjoy!

Part 1



Part 2

Windows 8 Enterprise, Don't be so serious!

A review and usage demonstration of Windows 8 Enterprise Eval.

This isn't as dull as you think it'll be...

A very good friend did this up and I did a bit of editing.

Good information about the minor quirks of Windows 8 Enterprise. Enjoy!

Part 1.

Part 2.

The IT Job Posting Code...(updated)

When times get a little rough in consulting I look for "regular" work to tide me over for a while.

You know my penchant for project and consulting work so when that fails me I end up resorting to the 9 to 5 grind.

The popular 80's phrase of "work smarter not harder" is important to keep in mind when reviewing job posts.

Now I know in this economy one should be willing to take any job just to get by but I'm a long-term thinker. It does no good for my reputation or my resume to land a job that ultimately makes me miserable, doesn't improve my skills and in general just wastes everyone's time. It runs contrary to my own little personal crusade of ridding IT of the "Frauds" who make life miserable for the rest of us striving to be more "Fundamentalist" in the field. If you're not engaged you're not really contributing anything so when looking at job postings keep these tips in mind:

1. If a posting doesn't fit at least 80% of your skills or experience don't bother with it. (Or Know Thyself...)

Recruiters (company or agency) have little punch lists given to them by the hiring manager. Hey, they're HR people not tech geeks and they won't understand any of your technobabble explanations about equivalent skills. If most of the posting looks like greek to you don't bother with it. Even if you landed the job I can guarantee you'll end up miserable and likely be out the door in less than 6 months. Of course that would let you list those new buzz-words on your updated resume but then you'd just be heading down the road of a "Fraud" which is ultimately unfullfilling.

2. Buzz Words ( Or fitting what you DO know into their little punch lists)

This may seem contrary to the previous guideline but it's not. Since these little punch-down lists are so important to HR recruiters it's important to give them what they want if you're actually qualified for the job they're advertising. Remember they're not tech people they can only go off what's in front of them on their list. So, if the posting says something like "Day to day administration of Windows Server 2003 and 2008 servers" Don't put "Windows Servers" on your resume. You're going to have to match their little punch-lists if you want a shot. If you have Server 2003 and 2008, list that skill.  

Otherwise you could be sending the impression that you're not confident in the platform they use. Often resumes are scanned for content and those without matching buzz-words are eliminated. Don't end up in the round file because you got lazy with your listed skills. Conversely, don't overload your resume with skills either. Nobody has the time to read all of that crap. Think newspaper articles. Get the important stuff they're interested in right up in their face and don't waste space on skills they don't care about unless they have some relevance. For Example, if you're a system admin with real experience in VMWare make sure to put it down if the posting happens to mention virtualization of any type.

3. Scan the posting carefully. (Or watch for the ambiguous)

I hate these types of posts. They remind me of classified ads for used cars (you know "Clean, runs good".) but nothing substantial about the job itself. It usually starts off with something like, "We need a Windows System Administrator with SQL Server and some Web development skills for our busy office in North Wonderfulville." Which is usually followed by 2 paragraphs about what a wonderful company they are and how great the benefits package is. You get a commercial for the company and almost nothing about the job. In this economy why are they selling themselves so hard? It's an immediate red flag that the hiring manager doesn't have a clue about the job or what they're looking for. I've responded to ads like this only to find out the job wasn't a System Admin but a web developer. I've actually had to explain that to the interviewer too. At the end I felt like I should have billed them for my time. Approach this type of posting at your own risk.

4. Dealing with employment agency and head hunter posts

You're more likely to deal with an employment agency or head hunter when getting a job these days. The previous guidelines apply with a few caveats. First, know that you're dealing with a middleman. It's not unlike the car salesman on a dealer's lot. Promises will be made that won't always be kept and when you discover the truth expect to be left holding the bag. It's not that I hate agencies, I just have a low tolerance for BS. It's actually worse to deal with an agency that it is to deal directly with an employer's HR department. Agencies get the same punch list and try to match it to their own skills database which may or may not be relevant to the employer's needs.

Turnover tends to be high in employment agencies and I've actually had my recruiter leave in the middle of an assignment and been dumped on another recruiter who has no clue about the employer you're assigned to. In that case they fall back on the basics of whatever the agreement is and you have virtually no representation from them if a problem develops. If something goes amiss they'll drop you like a hot potato and you'll never hear from them again. You've become a "difficult placement" which makes you a pariah even if you've done nothing wrong. Agencies are in it to make as much money on your labor as they can. Anything that gives the impression of threatening that throws the kill switch. Unless you love the job and expect to stay there after the contract is done, don't expect any long-term love from an agency.

Also watch out for long-term temp to hire contracts. If you're involved in a contract for more than a year know that you probably won't get paid vacation, medical benefits or any of the normal trappings. After a year it can be kind of rough to not have any benefits but all the responsibilities. On the upside you usually get a better hourly rate. Of course you have to question an employer that takes more than 6 months to commit to hiring someone. That's why I like contracts with a definitive end. I like to do my thing and get out before I go postal :)

5. The liars

Wow, that's a strong statement here's what I mean by it.

Caveat Emptor applies here. If you go through all the stuff I've already mentioned above you still have to be wary especially with an agency posting. Into this group I firmly place the resume stackers who operate on the shoot first, ask later principle.  If you've put a resume on monster.com in the past decade you've likely already heard from these types.  You know them, they're the ones who demanded your life history, mother's maiden name and social security number for a mid-level job that promised a CEO's salary.  Perhaps not that bad but it's a lie all the same.

Examples are usually more descriptive than paragraphs of babble so here's a good one....

I apparently applied for a position recently and the agency recruiter decided to get back to me on it. It took so long that I didn't even remember applying for the job so I was already at a disadvantage and the recruiter didn't help. There was no indication of when I applied, how I applied or who the job was for just a bunch of ambiguities..

Here's a piece of the posting and the email from the recruiter..

"I just left you a message regarding this opportunity. You had applied to my dice posting.
I'm going to include the job description for ease of communication.
I can be reached at xxx-xxx-xxxx.

Job Description
This position is not a laid back network/server monitoring position. This person must be able to handle the workload, corporate environment and interaction with executive level employees and global vendors. Candidate will be expected to be a leader guiding the network/server environment throughout the America's once they champion the PHX office. Previous corporate/enterprise experience on a team environment is important.

Any skills listed as required must be from hands-on work experience and not solely based on certifications or testing/home experience. This person will be a leader guiding the network/server environment throughout the America's once they champion the XXX office."

I looked over the job description and saw a couple of red flags right at the outset...
"This position is not a laid back network/server environment" Ok, That tells me one of two things. 

Either the management team is a bunch of insufferable jerks or they've been burned in the past. Either way

I can expect to be monitored like bacteria in a pitre dish. Great way to start a new job!

"Any skills listed ...must be from hands on work experience and not solely based on certifications or testing/home experience."


Ok, now I know they've been burned and have an attitude problem to boot. At this point I'm definitely NOT interested but wait there's more..

"The scope of the position also requires managing implementation projects falling under the scope of the Region for Liner and Logistics. Limited after normal business hours support responsibilities. Travel will be minimum."

Read that as "We own you" We all know there's no such thing as "limited after hours" when it comes to a global logistics company or any other company for that matter.  No thanks, that flies in the face of my "It's a job not a lifestyle" credo. The promise from the agency recruiter didn't even match up to her own job description as evidenced below...

The posting says "travel will be minimum" When I asked the recruiter about that she responded, "There isn't any travel------The company is global---it's a logistics company"

What?!

OK, Now I know I'm being lied to. How is travel NOT a requirement when it says it in the posting and requires you to be,"a leader guiding the network/server environment throughout the America's once they champion the PHX office. "?! 

That much use of the adjective, "limited" is always suspect.

This is a CYA move so the agency and the employer have an out when they start flying you all over the place and you start asking what "minimum" means. Sorry but that's a lie in my book.

The lie and the attitude turned me off. I wouldn't last a month in that kind of environment. I'd love to do some contract work for them but when offered, the agency turned me down. I guess I wasn't "humble enough".

Know thyself and you'll stay out of a lot of trouble. For me this wasn't an opportunity it was a noose...

6. You've landed the job, congratulations!  Don't get too comfortable...

Here's a little bit of advice that will make you life a whole lot easier.  Warning, this goes contrary to what most recruiters will tell you which is how you know it's true.  Remember, they're experts at placing candidates not doing the jobs they're trying to fill.

Here we go...

Treat every job like its a contract position even if its a regular full time gig.  It's rare to have one job for the rest of your life anyway unless you're self employed.  Most people move on to other positions every 3 to 5 years which doesn't exactly allow a lot of time to grow roots.  Be task oriented, take advantage of any new skills you can pick up and be ready to move on when the time is right.  Remember that loyalty comes from dogs not employers, don't be a dog.

Many people make the mistake of thinking their job is somehow a reflection of themselves. That's completely wrong, a "job" is one specific task to be completed and dismissed.  A career is compromised of a series of "jobs."  So don't be afraid to mix it up a bit.

There's an old adage that goes something like expecting to get a different result from doing the same thing repeatedly is madness and it is.

Life's too short to deal with other people's hangups for too long so keep your options open and save your loyalty for your own well being.